April 30, 2020
The Reality Of Our Wedding Postponement Day
And how we got through it
We were to host our dream destination wedding in April in Paris. We invited 23 of our nearest and dearest coming from all over the world. Chris & I had met in Paris almost 5 years ago whilst working at a wedding. He was the filmmaker and I was the photographer. 🙂 It was a love at first ‘accidental hand touch’… kinda story. You can Read our love story here:
For us, Paris felt like the natural way to tell our own wedding story and honor our relationship.
5 weeks before the wedding, we had to face the harsh reality of this current situation and postpone our wedding day. All those wedding dreams were shattered. I’m the kind of girl that will find the positive in every situation but nothing could prepare me for this reality.
To essentially take our minds off the absence of ‘what could have been’ and honor our relationship, I had planned a Wedding Postponement Day celebration for the 2 of us.
THEN… 4 days before the ‘meant to be wedding day’, I came down with cold and flu symptoms and felt awful. I honored my sickness and rested, filling my cup with funny movies and soups filled with immune-boosting greens.
When the postponement day arrived I was still sick. I was so upset that I wasn’t able to honor this day. We bickered with each other all morning due to the emotional stress, which upset us even more.
I didn’t want to remember our non-wedding day like this so I decided that I needed to snap out of this mess.
I made my hair and makeup pretty and we prepared a BBQ out in the sunshine and I started feeling better. The day ended up being so lovely. Just the two of us, our favorite BBQ food, and I even managed to drink a glass of wine to toast the day. Our families and friends were super supportive sending messages of love and thinking of us.
We didn’t do anything that I had originally planned for us to do for this postponement day. Not the cake, the fancy meal for 2, nor the dress up and take our photos in our home studio. But it ended up being imperfectly perfect.
The NEXT day I woke up feeling 100% better. There was no sign of sickness…It was clear to me now that it had been completely stress-related. Cold & flu symptoms are indeed also a symptom of high stress.
1.Accept that this ‘meant to be wedding day’ MIGHT be a hard day as you grieve what was meant to be. You have been planning this really special day for months or years and all of a sudden it’s not happening. There is a grieving process to go through no matter how much positivity you can find in this postponement.
2. Don’t feel pressured to plan too much on your postponement day. You don’t know how you are going to feel. For me, the disappointment I felt because I couldn’t do the things I had planned, made me more upset on top of an already emotional day.
3. In some countries, some couples seem to be sacrificing their original wedding plans to be able to get married now, having small elopement ceremonies. This is special too, but for us, we figured we only get married once, so we would rather wait and keep our original plans. We’ve already been together 5 years so waiting one more year to tie the knot is ok.
4. Be gentle with yourself. Stress takes a toll on the body and expresses its self in a whole range of unwanted symptoms from cold and flu-like symptoms, headaches, dizziness, sleep disturbances, and much more. If you notice any of these symptoms or anything else is not feeling right. Rest! (If symptoms persist consult a doctor).
When I woke up the after my ‘meant to be wedding day ‘I realized that if I had got married yesterday it would be over. Now we still get to look forward to it all. That filled my heart with relief and excitement. Once that ‘meant to be wedding day’ passes everything feels normal again. I promise.
If this article helped you in any way, please tag someone who needs to hear this.
We can get through this.
Big hugs, Claire xox
All photos @hanrihuman